Eyebrow Tattoing the Enemy

This weekend I am going out with my ex best friend. She betrayed me when we were 21 and I have never quite forgiven her but every now and I again I get roped into doing something with her. So […]

Continue Reading

Tulips for my mother

It is always difficult to shop for my mother. Not only does she have everything but she has two of everything. The woman is an expert buyer. If she finds something she likes, she finds the cheapest but best version […]

Continue Reading

Roses in ritual

As a mystic, I dabble in all occult practices. I cross paths from wicca to Buddhism and beyond. All religions and magical paths have significance, that’s what Madam Blavatsky said. You can take a little bit from each religion to […]

Continue Reading

Portentous Flowers

I’ve been experimenting with different way ways to read the future. Tea leaves and crystal balls are tried and trusted, and tarot cards are great but you can only do them so many times before you get bored. I figure […]

Continue Reading

Nailing That Ethereal Look

Dearest, children, dearest children…did you know that once upon a time, I had a shop front? Yes, it seems so very far away now, but I welcomed many customers into my mystical den of wisdom and incense. Unfortunately I had […]

Continue Reading

Non human me: Tech genius

When I first realised I was a non-human I was pretty upset. My whole life I thought I was made of flesh and blood but it turns out inside I’m just metal and plastic. My human parents never had the […]

Continue Reading

The best brand for ovens and fridges (hint: you’ll never guess what it is)

I guess you might call me a bit of a white goods floozy. What do you expect when they keep breaking down on me? I’ve had all kinds of appliances in all kinds of brands and have written countless online […]

Continue Reading

My future fortune

Everyone is always coming up with new app ideas. Genius ideas they think everyone will love. 99% of the time they are wrong and their idea is either stupid or has been done. However, I really think I have come […]

Continue Reading

Those Blessed Conveyers of Homes

Friends, seekers, those who practice the art of calculating finances and detecting evasions of such things, welcome to my corner of the internet! I seek to dole out humble advice, so please do not think of me as some universal, […]

Continue Reading

Take Heed of Food Packaging

Children, seekers, solicitors, tax collection agents, all of you are most welcome! Today’s topic will shock and amaze many of you, especially given my usual stance on embracing the modern world as evidence of the progress of mankind. Certainly, I […]

Continue Reading